Proverbs 31 Woman

I have been doing a 31 day challenge to read Proverbs chapter 31 everyday for 31 days. This challenge is presented by Nancy Leigh DeMoss at http://www.reviveourhearts.com/. Each day, her website emails me a new discussion as we work through the verses of Proverbs 31. It is so good and so appropriate for healing my marriage and showing me the areas I need to work on.

It is too easy to get in the mindset of retribution - meaning my husband has to constantly be punished and make amends for what he has done. This line of thinking is completely wrong and unbiblical. I have said it before and will say it again, just because my husband has sinned does not give me the right to sin in response to his actions. I have to take responsibility for my own actions and responses daily.

One thing I have learned and felt very convicted about is Proverbs 31:12 "She brings him good and not evil all the days of her life." One of the themes discussed by Nancy Leigh DeMoss is that this verse does not say, "She does him good and not evil as long as he does her good - as long as he is kind to her, as long as he remembers her birthdays and anniversaries, as long as he meets her needs". This reminded me that I am to do good to my husband regardless of how he responds to me. I am called to love him and serve him unconditionally and for his good. This does not mean I am to be a doormat or allow him to do things contrary to God's way but I am his helper and I am to be faithful & loyal in my commitment to him.

Some would be quick to point out that my husband broke his marriage vows to me not the other way around. My response to them is I can only focus on me and live my life according to God's standard to the best of my ability through the leading of the Holy Spirit. This is not something I can do on my own, but through Christ, I can overcome the hurt, anger and sadness. I honestly believe that if I do these things then it will only make my marriage stronger and make my husband an even better man.

The other area I felt conviction is regarding my commitment to my marriage. In this discussion, Nancy Leigh DeMoss asks a very important questions, "Have you totally eliminated the D-word, divorce, from your vocabulary?" The answer in my case is no. I tend to pull out this arsenal when I am feeling the deepest pain and emotions. She goes on to tell us that we cannot be a Proverbs 31 woman if divorce is still in our vocabulary. From this point on I am removing that word from my bag of weapons.

This has been a great challenge so far and it has encouraged me to focus on myself rather than on my husband. I am grateful for the things God is revealing to me so that I can grow and change according to His Will.